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| I started out with a cry. And then with the practicality of finding my site (it's been a while)
and already having gone through a litany of questions and answers to God by the time I arrived at the site,
I 'm thinking I don't need to put my pain out there.
Everybody else already has enough of their own.
If I sound short, it's because I probably am....with myself.
I'm irritated that I am such a baby......uh oh..the cry is coming back.....
I seek and I find... yet it is not enough.
I knock and the door is opened.....yet I want more.
Revelations come, but what do I do with them?
Urgency with patience...
I read & I study with the Holy Spirit's guidance and the wisdom from our pastors and teachers...yet
I cry out for more of Jesus..I am so blessed....and yet I am not enough of a blessing.
I want more, yet how do I use that more.
It's all about Him and being in His presence and operating in the Spirit...the other stuff just isn't enough
for me. This is not "self righteous" talk....it is a weak person trying to surrender completely to Jesus every day all day long....crying out in my frailties because I know I am only strong and good and pure and am able to help(serve) others when I am in His presence.
I am of no value without Him....and He determines when & where...and He is sovereign...and so I cry out...and I pray...and I read His Word to get close to Him and know Him better and be in His will and not miss something that could give me more time in His presence and purify me for His work ....to have His peace and know that I will stand before Him one day and He will say "well done, my good & faithful servant".
I realize that even this cry is motivated out of selfishness...."I" want more of Jesus..."I" want to be more like Jesus...yet it does lead me to Jesus..and I do pray for continual thirst so that I will not grow dull or hardened.
And our God is a merciful God- full of love and grace through Jesus....full of compassion...
and so I cry out...
I stand on "the Rock" and I dive into the clear sweet pure cleansing precious blood of Jesus..that cost Him so much....
Dear Lord....pour it over me, let it surround me, flow it through me so that I am joined by others in this life giving precious blood of Yours
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| Ever see a "zombie" movie?
People walking around, as if alive, yet not - usually with their arms straight out in front of them, as if in a trance.
These zombies were not strong, but they would just keep coming at you. Then more would show up and there would be groups of zombies to overpower those who were not zombies.
In Luke 17:20-21, the pharisees asked Jesus when the kingdom of God would come, and Jesus replied,
"The kingdom of God does not come with careful observation, nor will people say, 'Here it is' or 'There it is,' because the kingdom of God is within (among) you."
And then Jesus went on to share about the Second Coming, using the days of Noah and the time of Lot as examples of what it would be like.
The disciple' response was a question - "Where, Lord?"
with Jesus replying "Where there is a dead body, there the vultures will gather."
Now my zombie movie, has not only groups of zombies moving towards me, but also has vultures circling overhead of these seemingly soulless bodies with their arms outstretched. And the palms of their hands are now turned upward as if calling for help.
And the movie is here and now and we are among all these dead bodies with arms stretched outward; with spirits of prey circling overhead and among us.
But it doesn't end there...
In Luke 18: 1-8, Jesus goes on to tell the parable of the persistent widow. Who persistently pleaded with the judge (who neither feared God nor cared about man) to grant her justice, to protect and defend her against her adversary.
Following the answer given by the judge -
"And the Lord said, "Listen to what the unjust judge says. And will not God bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to Him day and night? Will he keep putting them off? I tell you, He will see that they get justice, and quickly. However, when the Son of Man comes, will He find faith on earth?"
There is Hope!
Now as the "zombies move toward us, instead of running and more dead bodies, our arms stretch out toward them and embrace them. And in that embrace, they receive the Holy Spirit of Jesus and are delivered from
"birds of prey." They experience freedom and life and now their arms stretch upward toward the ONE who freed them. In their response they give praise and glory and honor to their Redeemer and their Savior.
They are alive! They are born again! Jn 3:3, 5-8
They are no longer the living dead! They are living! ..They have "crossed over from death to life."
" However, when the Son of Man comes, will He find faith on earth?"
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| Does
what we are trying to say with our hearts to express our love for Jesus, came out as beautiful and creative as it feels inside?
Our Spirit response to our Maker and Savior, our Creator, Redeemer.
His response back to ourself/Himself inside of us.
The love, beauty, the kindness, the goodness, the gentleness, the peace, the faithfulness, the patience, the self-control are all responses back to Him. Do we see and experience these responses around us?
But wait, do you hear it?
Roaring? Rumbling? Bubbling? Gurgling?
Waters deep within us that never stop; that keep pushing upward , full of life and love and creativity.
Waters that continue to flow and to keep flowing. To keep up with it, we must give. We must give so that we can receive more to give. Keep receiving the water- go deeper- it's never ending!
How do we express this kind of love and thankfulness to God?
To God, who is everything;
to our Lord, who is the answer to everyone's question;
to the "hole-filler" in everyone's heart, everyone's search for more.
"O, for a thousand tongues to sing...." Imagine - what possibilities! What realities!
Nature and the change it goes through reflects the creativity and beauty of our God in its response.
We get to experience not only the creativity and beauty of our change, our response to God, we get to participate;
participate with the Holy Spirit and participate with the others who are participating! We get to participate with those who are not participating (knowingly or unknowingly). We get to be a part of bringing beauty and creativity where it is not evident. We get to be a part of sharing the waters that are within us; waters wanting to get out, wanting to give life, wanting to respond with creativity and beauty of the love we feel for God.
Pour out your water!
And then we get to see the flower bloom, the new vine, the branch grow, the seed planted.....or... maybe the blank stare, the objections given, the condescension, the person walk away.
There is no change, no sign that reveals beauty or love or life. But, we have just poured out living water?!?
Something has to happen. Maybe the water is going through the "hole," down deep to its' source.
Maybe it needs more water...keep pouring...keep giving...ask others to pour...others to give..trust God...trust His living water...it will not return void. Isaiah 55:10-12
What joy to operate out of knowing that living water is being poured into someones heart/life and that God is at work: that we believe that, that we know that, that is where the joy comes from -doing the Father's work.
Knowing that He is faithful - and we get to pour the water and watch His beauty and creativity-
we get to watch others pour and watch His beauty and creativity- today, tomorrow, always- knowing that He is working, He is in control - what joy!
Pour and watch - the response is more living water.
"You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit - fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. This is my command: Love each other." Jn. 15:16-17
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| As I watched and listened to their words, a piece of their lives unfolded before me and I wanted to cry.
But, I couldn't because of where I was sitting.
But, Jesus could and did, and His Holy Spirit testified inside me of it as I struggled to keep my composure.
I did not want to keep my composure. I wanted to burst out that Jesus understands. Jesus can help you.
He can heal those broken places. You see, because Jesus loves, really loves you!
Oh Lord the consequences of their choices in their lives have brought such pain and sadness and further consequences. They do not know.
And now in the solitude of my home, the pain I feel for them bursts forth in tears that have have been held back for almost 2 days.
And I begin to pray.
I pray that You, O Lord, will reach out to them and they will "call on the name of the Lord and be saved".
Because You really do love them.
We implement the consequences that will hopefully change the behavior....
but You implement the Spirit which will change the heart.
Again I pray, please have mercy on these lives and have them call on the name of the Lord.
They need rescued, O Lord, and you are the One to rescue.
I do not want to forget these deep emotions I have for these lost souls.
To daily feel this pain would take it's toll on me, but God however you choose to keep this before me and a part of who I am, I surrender to You.
If we do not pray for them, who will?
I know that God loves them more than I can possibly understand and I thank you Lord that you have brought them into my life and I have the privilege of praying for them.
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| This is such a wonderful song.
There are so many wonderful songs that have sprung out of the hearts of people's experiences with God. And we are the grateful recipients of them. We are able to eavesdrop with permission into the lives of others whom God has touched. And because God is a God of abundance, those songs of experience become our songs of experience. We get to sing their words to God from our heart - to make them our words.
And then we get to sing those words to God with the other saints and we become a chorus before the throne of God. (Rev. 4)
Many, yet as one.
Now what started as one person's response to God, becomes many peoples response to God specific to their circumstances, all the while transforming before His eyes and growing in number.
We live in constant change -and as we are transformed by the renewing of our minds our worship changes.
God never changes, but our understanding changes.
How great is our God!! (Another great song).
"Thou art worthy , O Lord,
to receive glory and honor and power:
for thou hast created all things,
and for thy pleasure they are created and were created." Rev.4:11
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